September 5, 2014

{Guest Post} Why Our Marriage Works

While Hubs and I are down in Georgia visiting my family, I have invited a couple of my fav bloggers and bestest friends to fill in for me. First up is Melissa from The Rambling Llama. If you don't follow her, you totally should. Especially if you're a mom. She totally keeps it all real, all the time; no funny business or sugar coating and that's pretty awesome. She's also one of my oldest friends, so she knows a lot about me and how I operate and when I asked her to write a post for you guys she came up with a great one that also fits in with what I like to talk about here myself. So take it away Melissa!

I would like to first ask, where the heck has this year gone? It's September already. I feel like time is just flying by. Is it just me? September (I think) is one of those months that just kind of is there. Sure, there's Labor Day, but it's at the beginning of the month. Not much else to look forward to unless you have a birthday or anniversary. I happen to have an anniversary this month.

Thanks right, y'all. On Sept 18th, Hubby and I will be married for 6 years. I know it doesn't seem like a lot, but after being together for eight years and married for (almost) 6, I feel pretty accomplished. I feel better this year about our relationship than I did last year- that's for sure! I know a lot of my favorite bloggers either just got married or are planning a marriage, so today I wanted to share some things from Josh and myself. *and yes, Josh did help me write these! Isn't he the greatest?*

// Communication.
We talk about our day. I tell him everyone I talk to, and he tells me about his
day. We never run out of things to say. This is so important for any
relationship. For a while there, we stopped talking. I mean we would talk, but
it would be about normal household stuff. We weren’t joking, or laughing, or
telling each other how we feel. I cannot stress enough that your partner needs
to know how you’re feeling. Don’t assume they know you’re mad. Don’t assume
anything. If you don’t like a certain meal, tell them. Whatever it is… just
tell your partner. Things that get left unsaid tend to sit and boil until the
point of no return, and by then you’re so mad at your partner it’s just
// Religion. 
Let’s be clear, I’m not telling you that you have to have religion in your house or
not. That’s totally up to you. We’re not here to force certain beliefs down
anyone’s throats. I will say having an understanding in our house that we do
believe in God and that we do pray daily (as a family) has helped us a lot. In
the past eight years, Josh and I have been though a lot together. From
evictions, to new jobs, kids, one or both of us getting fired. You name it, we’ve
probably been there. And sure, if something comes up these days at least one of
us will have a brief freak out moment. (Usually me, and usually via twitter). Sorry,
sad but true. But, after the freak out has passed we sit and pray together and
it always works out for the best. It might not be the result we wanted or
expected, but in the end it worked.
// Jokes. 
We still laugh at each other. I call Josh a Goober all the time (to which he
replies with calling me a peanut). He knows it makes me laugh because a goober
is a peanut. We have little inside jokes that we know most people don't understand, but that's why they're special. Because they're ours. Mostly Josh laughs at the stupid way I pronounce certain words, and I laugh at his obsession for WWE.
// Share the chores.
Let’s face it, y’all: we’re not all super human. We all need help, and we all
need to know when to ask for help. Sharing house-hold chores makes everything
so much easier. Sure, I may not like the way he loads the dishwasher, but he
does it and I’m not about to complain and risk that going away! We have a
// Raising the kids.
If you remember my post “A Letter to New Moms”, raising kids is not an easy
task and there’s no rule book to it. So taking two people and trying to figure
out this whole kid thing is, well, amusing really. Sure, we both lose our cool and
lose our patience with the kids but that’s bound to happen with anyone. The
beauty of our marriage is we both agree on what we should (and shouldn’t) do
with the kids.

I think marriage is like raising kids. There's no right or wrong way to do it, and it's always a learning process. Things are always going to change. You have to be willing to adapt to those changes and work with your partner. It is a partnership after all.

What would you include in this list? What would you remove? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

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